The letter we sent our families after we sat down with the kids and told them about Jared. Emma cried and wanted to come home from school and be here and help, we told her that she can help us by finishing the semester strong and staying in Utah and not doing things to cause us to stress. Eli cried and walked away from us several times. I am not sure he knew what to do. He texted his baseball coaches. He didn't find jokes funny. He took it VERY seriously and was very stressed out. The twins I don't believe understood the full gravity of everything. When Jared asked them if they knew what the prostate was they asked if it was his balls. Jared said no. Then they asked if it was his "holder" - we had a good laugh about that one. They never cried. They made a couple of jokes with us and then realized how serious it was, but we were grateful they weren't stressed about it. We timed telling the kids just right so that Emma was home with us, we didn't want to ruin her birthday with it, but we wanted them told early enough that it gave her a chance to stew on it and be fully confident when she left to go back to Utah that everything would be ok!
Hello all - just wanted to give some news on Jared ...
Every year at Intel Jared does a health check. They quit doing it when Covid happened. This year they started it up again, but they changed it to an at-home kit instead of an in-office blood draw. He signed both of us up but our kits got mixed up, after we completed everything and sent them back, so they had to send us new kits. At that point we were over it and Jared told them don't worry about it. New kits ended up showing up at our house and by this time we were still over it but Jared felt like we needed to do it so we completed the kits and sent them back (just a finger prick with some blood samples).
The results came in and Jared's PSA levels were high (PSA is a prostate health marker). He was told to reach out to his doctor so he did. She said it could just be a mistake from the at home test. So she drew more blood in office and it was even higher.
She sent him right away to a urologist. Jared filled out the questionnaire and answered everything perfectly! No symptoms, no signs, nothing. The PA wasn't very worried but did a prostate exam anyway. He found a nodule. It needed to be biopsied right away. That night our Bishop came over and gave Jared a blessing. We did it in Emma's room and told the boys it was just church stuff.
We went in for his biopsy. They did a lot. Jared was hurting. We then went back 2 weeks later for the results and he was diagnosed with prostate cancer. That night RJ and Nathan came over and gave him a great blessing. They had been sworn to secrecy. We again, did it in Emma's room and told the boys RJ needed a blessing so no one would be suspicious.
Jared then did another test where they injected his veins with a radioactive liquid and scanned his whole body to see if the cancer has spread, which thankfully it hasn't.
The final test Jared had to do was a painful invasive bladder check to make sure it is OK and it is OK as well - this was the final hurdle to clear Jared for surgery.
Jared is set to have surgery on April 18th to remove his prostate (robot-assisted radical prostatectomy). The cancer is for sure all over the left side and the doctor thinks because of how much came back in his biopsy that it's on the right side too. They will be cutting into his nerves, removing everything, etc. Recovery time will be at least 8 weeks - Jared has already communicated major details with key co-workers, all of which have been very compassionate and accommodating.
IF YOU ARE A BLOOD RELATIVE OF JAREDS (Brothers, father, sons, nephews): Because Jared got this in his 40s the chances of you getting it young are much higher than the average person. When you turn 40 you need to go get a PSA test (basic blood draw) to get a baseline and be watching it. However, if you get prostate cancer as an older adult, your bloodline has the same chance as the general population of getting prostate cancer.
Jared and I are extremely grateful to our Father in Heaven during this time. We have known since January. It is a blessing the way we caught it so early. The doctor sees no problem with him beating this. It will be a long road to recovery though. He will be in the hospital for a night or two after surgery. He will come home with a catheter for 2 weeks. He won't be able to do or lift anything for at least 6 weeks (only walking will be allowed). There are a couple of other concerns that have us worried, but we do believe that it just means 2023 will be a long road but in the end Heavenly Father will lift us through it and we will grow closer together as a family throughout this whole thing.
We are telling our kids tonight about all of this (this email was written in the morning). We plan to give them all blessings of peace and comfort. We have waited this long to tell them so we would know all the facts, dates, etc and can answer any questions they might have.
Feel free to reach out with any questions/etc! We've learned much more about prostates than we care to know lol. We'll probably have our phones off for most of the night but please reach out if you'd like!
We love you all!
Jared and Carol
